So I had a bizarre dream last night. In other news, I really do live! My photoshop is still being a pain, though, so.....I haven't been drawing. I've been pounding out my grades as much as possible. Now I sit and wait for them. It's like standing in line for a scary roller coaster that will haunt you at night as a roller-coaster shaped ghost after you get off the ride.

So why I am sharing this dream is a mystery. It's so mysterious it's almost like Nancy Drew putting on a jumpsuit and inventing reverse velcro.

Alright, to the dream! If you're reading this then you have reached the epitome of boredom.

The Dream

I rolled over in my bed to try to turn of my alarm clock, which sounded like a bunch of people screaming as their rocket ship exploded in space. I couldn't find it so I screamed "darn it! I'm trying to sleep here!" as I rolled over and blinked sleepily into the light, knowing I'd have to get up to find my alarm.

This is when I saw Shia LaBeouf wearing my clothing. I raised my eyebrow the best I could as he said "SHHH!!" dramatically, frantically looking for something under my bed.

"May I help you?" I asked, looking down at him.

"It's them, they're coming, it's hard to explain, I had to find a disguise" he said frantically, wearing a determined, dramatic look.

"Okay, you know what...." I said, getting out of my bed and heading towards the door so I could go make breakfast "....you do that. I'm going to go find the wallaby". I knew this would make sense to him.

I walked into my kitchen and saw a bloody fish on the counter. "Ugh!" I screamed as a genie came out of the garbage disposal.

"Get lost" said the genie, quickly putting on my oven mitts and checking the oven, where it was cooking salmon.

I stared at the genie incredulously. I wanted to ask about three wishes, but it seemed pretty angry, so I went into my room and moped. I realized that I would be late for school if I didn't get ready soon, so I walked back into my room to notice that Shia LaBeouf making a sculpture of Daniel Radcliffe morphing into a butterfly. I opened my mouth to question him but he threw an eye patch at me.

"Wear this, it'll help" he said.

"With what?" I asked.

"With your face" he said.

"What!?" I said, getting creeped out by the statue as he continued.

"The transformers need to know that we humans can make statues that show humans transforming into true beauty. I was going to do a Dansel one but unfortunately the only true human being is Harry Potter, so I had to show Bumblebee that we understand insects" he said quickly, jumping on my bed and then exploding into a poof of orange.

Before I could even react to THAT, King Tritan was in my room glaring at me.

"Don't you know how much I HATE statues!?" he screamed, pointing his trident at the statue and causing it to explode as he swam through the air. He then flew through my window, bumped into Aang, and then they both went 'flying' off holding hands.

I began feeling something crawl up my leg so I tried to shake it off. It was my sister, headbanging on the ground as her hair hit my leg. I knew that this meant that she ran out of toothpaste and was trying to ask me for some, so I ran to her bathroom and gave her some more (because it made sense then).

As I walked out, three women with white hair were waiting for me. One was smiling, one was frowning, and one had a neutral expression.

"Welcome, Pronk, we weren't expecting you" said the smiling one "we are the closet sisters".

"I used to own a closet" I said, trying to fit in.

"My name is grina" said the smiling woman, pointing to the frowning one and saying “this is frownella and this is neutralie”.

“It’s like you just….appeared out of nowhere, like you are mutants, like you know how to get through beauty school without ever meeting Douglas” I said, not knowing who the heck Douglas was or what I was saying. They didn’t seem to know either.

“We are sent by Optimus Prime” said the first lady.

I quickly whipped out my Pokedex and heard it say “Optimus Prime, the only pokemon who was caught cheating on togepi”.

I nodded as if I understood and saying “Yes?”.

“Unfortunately, even though Megatron was destroyed, a much more powerful force as been birthed at the depths of the earth. It’s nearly unstoppable and its sheer strength alone could crush planets” said Neutralie.

“It eats gamma ray waves for breakfast” said Grina.

“I hate you” said Frownelia.

“What kind of force could be so great?” I began in wonder, sticking my elbows into a jar of pudding for effect.

“It is not only great, it is far more evil than Megatron. We need someone other than you to stop it” said Neutralie.

“How about Team Rocket?” I asked as they shook their heads in disapproval.

“Do you even know the raw power that a single glance from this being holds? Do you know the…I dare not say its name” said Neutralie.

“What is it, what is this force?” I asked in wonder, realizing that pudding on my elbows was gross.

They looked at me in horror and then in a dramatic whisper said “It’s worse than Megatron, it’s more powerful than the core of the planet, it’s…it’s…SCANTRON!”.

I remember screaming in horror. The earth rumbled and Carmina Burana played in children’s voices. I realized then that scantron owned me, my life….I had become a slave to scantron without even realizing it.

I ran into my room and threw my blankets over my head, willing it all to go away. I knew Rhett and Link could help, but I didn’t know where to find them.

I then woke up. Obviously, I a) never watched the transformers trailer before bed, b) love exams, and c) should raise goats for a living. Keep your chupacabras away.